Rapture Pets

Okay – this is pretty funny…  from here.

You’ve committed your life to Jesus. You know you’re saved. But when the Rapture comes what’s to become of your loving pets who are left behind?   Eternal Earth-Bound Pets takes that burden off your mind.

We are a group of dedicated animal lovers, and atheists. Each
Eternal Earth-Bound Pet representative is a confirmed atheist, and as such will still be here on Earth after you’ve received your reward.  Our network of animal activists are committed to step in when you step up to Jesus…….

….Our service is plain and simple; our fee structure is reasonable.
For $110.00 we will guarantee that should the Rapture occur within ten (10) years of receipt of payment, one pet per residence will be saved.  Each additional pet at your residence will be saved for an additional $15.00 fee. A small price to pay for your peace of mind and the health and safety of your four legged friends.

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2 Responses to Rapture Pets

  1. Wade says:

    My favourite part is under the FAQs:

    Q: How do you ensure your representatives won’t be Raptured?
    A: Actually, we don’t ensure it, they do. Each of our representatives has stated to us in writing that they are atheists, do not believe in God / Jesus, and that they have blasphemed in accordance with
    Mark 3:29, negating any chance of salvation.

    Agreed – funny, except I have a strange feeling in my stomach about it all.

  2. Tim says:

    true enough Wade, very true. funny and sad/weird in a number of ways.

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